Nothing is more practical than finding God, 

that is, than falling in a love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, 

what seizes your imagination will affect everything. 

It will decide what will get you out of bed in the mornings, 

what you will do with your evenings, 

how you spend your weekends, 

what you read, 

who you know, 

what breaks your heart, 

and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. 

Fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything.

Pedro Arrupe, SJ

Strong Women

her all but husband was killed
last week
in Juarez
seventeen bullets

another gut-wrenching case of the wrong place at the wrong time

three children
would have seen him that day
would have played
would have smiled
would have spent time in each others' presence

now five years old pulls away
doesn't smile
his wide toothy smile
doesn't empty the contents of his mary-poppins pockets on my desk
isn't wowed by a new brown hat
cries mid-conversation
and wants to be powerful so he can go to heaven and bring his daddy back

nine years old wants his brother to be okay

two years old isn't sure quite what to make
of all this change

and mom speaks these words
not without attachment
but with the weight of a woman grieving
loss upon loss
and knowing that for her sons
she must find the bright spots
in each coming day




without discounting her pain
she brings a human face to what i imagine
the fabled Eve may have felt
upon realizing the plight
that her children would have
to endure
did she know
that this life would be full of dark tragedies
and, grieving herself,
did she pray a silent prayer
for all of us
and try, for her own,
to gently find the bright spots
in each coming day

Dora

She has shiny black hair
and beautiful brown eyes
and she spreads wide the fingers on her two small hands like she’s afraid I’ll slip away
if she doesn’t

“Hi, Miss.”
she says as she smiles
looking up at me
her chin firmly planted in my stomach
and her arms around my waist

I return the greeting
and marvel at the change in this dear child
Who not five months ago was a very different little girl

She pushed me away
And ran for the door
And cried
and screamed
and wouldn’t couldn’t didn’t listen

she ran halfway across the field toward the parking lot
ran away down the sidewalk in the dark
ran out of the girl scout meeting
she ran and she ran and she ran
because staying in one place was too painful

but I tell her I love her
and she’s beautiful
and I want her to be safe
and I want her to smile
and I think she can make good choices
and I mean it

And I think she believes me

She’s calmer now
And her beautiful brown eyes sparkle more
Now she runs to give me a hug
And then returns to her mother’s care
Or her girl scout meeting

I think she just wants to know that one more person won’t run away
a sort of “hit them before they hit you” mentality
It’s sad, you know. These are grown-up feelings.
Or better, nobody should have to feel them at all
and she’s only seven

she ran into the dining room
“Can I come, miss?”
The movie night was for older kids
But if it was alright with mom
And she stayed calm
She could join us

So she sat on my lap
And munched on her popcorn
And turned to face me
As the movie ended
“I did good tonight, didn’t I?”
“Yes, Yes you did.”

as the credits rolled
and we swept wayward popcorn
off the dining room floor
we realized that we were both dancing
to the same song

so we danced together
a happy little dance
and smiled together
giant happy smiles

and one more moment told me
that our little explorer will be okay

I like birds

For some reason, I feel like birds are one of the ways I am reminded of God's presence and beauty and creative care.
I like to hear birds singing outside my window or in a tree along a path.
I am comforted to see flocks of birds taking off, flying, calling to each other.
A single hawk or eagle...that's a sight to behold
I found a really neat piece of art - a flock of birds, I like to think they're doves - at a garage sale. $3. Rockin'.
They just seem free - not worried - trusting. And they remind me that I am cared for.


   “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
Matthew 6:25-27