Happy birthday to my mommy!

less worries, more food

Ingredients

• 1 cup unsalted butter
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup cooked, pureed pumpkin (fresh or canned)
• 1 egg
• 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
• 2 cups unbleached allpurpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
• 1 cup walnuts, coarsely chopped
• 1 cup raisins

Icing:

• 2 cups sifted confectioners' sugar
• 1/4 cup butter, softened
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 3 tablespoons whipping cream, fresh orange juice or rum

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cream butter and sugar until fluffy. Add pumpkin, egg and vanilla and mix well. Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon and nutmeg. Stir into butter mixture until well blended. Add nuts and raisins. Drop by teaspoonful onto parchment covered baking sheet, about 2 inches apart. Bake about 15 minutes, or until golden. Cool.

Icing: Cream confectioners' sugar and butter. Add remaining ingredients and beat until smooth. (If icing is too thin, add more confectioners' sugar; if too thick, add more cream, orange juice or rum.) Drizzleover cookies.

I haven't made the icing yet, and I think they're just fabulous as is. I added a little bit of pumpkin pie spice because we don't have ginger. 

Wow. So tasty. 

Also, working on recreating the breadsticks from Roslyn. First attempt: not even close, but very tasty.

worries on a weekend? no, but thanks for asking.

"You shouldn't have any worries on the weekend. Unless, of course, you're worrying about what you're going to eat." 


I didn't hear that advice until this morning, but you'd think I'd been living by it for the last few weeks. We've had dinner gatherings the last couple weekends, usual baking parties, and always thoughts of next week's menu. 


Two weeks ago I made a baked rice, roasted tomato, and roasted poblano pepper dish (with a little help from my culinary-minded friends). Success.


Last week I made a whole slew of pumpkin fun: pies, mini-pies (with a beautifully easy dough), ravioli (with not so much help in the dough department), and soup. Also with help from my pumpkin gutting and hungry-bellied friends. 


This weekend is different. No plans (at least not in the traditional Laura sense). No worries. Just an semi-clean empty house and me, tired from my week, but semi-content. 


I've got Joshua Radin on Grooveshark, and my first ever focaccia dough rising in the kitchen, courtesy of Suzanne Dunaway's No Need to Knead. I hope Colleen doesn't read this until she comes back; it's a sort of welcome-home present :). 






From outside eyes, there's a lot to write about, and I guess I agree. But the difference now is that the events of my life don't seem like sensational experiences. They are, but they just seem like life; real, true, living-here life. Not sightseeing, not immersion, just day-to-day wonderfulness. But I understand why you'd want to hear about it; you're not here, and I'm not there. So I'll try to recap a bit :) 


But where should I start....?


Beginning of October - hosted BBQ and outdoor movie night for my families at work. Pitched a screen and watched Ratatouille with my favorite people under three feet tall while they sipped and spilled root beer floats and fell asleep on their blankets. 


shortly thereafter - Albuquerque Hot Air Balloon Fiesta! Shared a hotel room with a gaggle of fantastic ladies, and woke up long before the sun to see one of the most spectacular man-made sights of my life - such a flurry of people and movement and color - oh the color. Hundreds of balloons unfolding and inflating and dispersing into the lightening sky. There was something magical and childish about the whole production, and I was happy to take part.


work - i went on a routine trip to the school supply closet and found a sobbing nine-year-old who didn't want anyone to know how scared he was that EMS had taken his mom to the hospital. 


community night - dinner at the Sisters' house - chili and cornbread, maybe it was. Tasty food, sobresaliente company, and a very prayerful experience


JAMIE CAME! Our Area Coordinator was in town for a week, so we gave her a proper El Paso welcome - Col made enchiladas for dinner, and we took her to the mirador with some of our friends. Had a picnic in the park in leiu of JustFaith :(. Laurita lost her voice, I broke the blender, and Col made some killer oatmeal fudge bars (natalieskillercuisine.com). Wednesday was karaoke night at the Tap with a good number of new friends, Thursday a beautiful, relaxing, comtemplative reflection day, and Friday the beginning of a new adventure.


Load Colleen, Jens (Annunciation House volunteer from Stuttgart, Germany), Laura, and Laura in the car, and call it a road trip to Roswell. Laura's family is from Alien-town, and we were all too happy to join in on the fun. Jens, Colleen, and I ended up camping a night near Bonito Lake in Ruidoso, a truly chilly but extremely cool experience. Jens made a fire, I started the stove (check that out, OTEA - I learned something from you!) and made soup. We toasted bread and toasted to our friendship. Oh, and we stumbled on Ruidoso's Oktoberfest somewhere in the middle of all that. Poor imitations of German culture, but fun dancing songs, according to Jens. Top off the experience with a sighting of the world's largest pistachio. 


work - Spirit of Giving Tree tags. Halloween party preparations. Get a completely unexpected and overwhelmingly gracious donation from the family of a dear friend. Buy 30 costumes for my children (which they loved, by the way!). It's lovely to be able to leave a place better than I found it. Future TLC JV - you've got a costume collection now - french fries, wizard cloaks, teenage mutant ninja turtles, and a slew of princesses. 


'pumpkin carving party' - Mentioned because it was an unqualified success. In quotations because pumpkin carving was the least of the festivities. 
HOLD PLEASE - Focaccia needs to go in the oven.
wow. that was a lovely experience. my hands smell like olive oil and fresh dried rosemary. 
so. pumpkin carving party. that's how we advertised it. turned out that we were all supposed to bring a dish, and we had been bantering back and forth with a new friend who grew up firmly rooted in both Mexican and US traditions, but just couldn't wrap his mind around the reasons for jack-o'-lanterns. Turns out we had no idea either. So I was to provide story time on pumpkin faces, and he was to help us understand Dia de los Muertos. Enter Luis, with two HUGE bags of stuff. "There's more in the truck," he says. He finally brings in all of everything - a huge pot of...something, some decorations for Dia de los Muertos, some little sugar skulls, coconut candy from Juarez, and the necessary kitchen utensils to accompany the huge ziplock bag of dough in the middle of the table. Pumpkin empanadas. Suddenly carving the oversized squashes wasn't so important. Empanadas became a steady part of our (my) diet for the better part of the weekend. 
also: full moon hike and beautiful view, led by Mike the Franklin Mtns. volunteer guide and Theology on Tap friend. Went to Notre Dame, knows some of my favorite people in the world. 


Week 1: El Paso Half Marathon training. 
Week 1: Laura gets sick. 


work: get completely discouraged at the lack of pumpkins in the El Paso area. Try to shake it off. Get mass candy donations. buy paint. give out costumes and help participants decorate their hallways. 


thursday: cross training = walk a promising road until it ends in a fence. make trails up a hill overlooking El Paso. vow to find real trails next week.


pumpkin weekend - bake lots of stuff. Ravioli was okay - that's what I really wanted to make, but the dough wasn't very cooperative. I'll try again. The pie was 'kinda good,' which I think means 'really good.' 


Sent Colleen home to be with her family (Tom Kilbride for IL State Supreme Court!)

And now we get to this week:

Sunday. Climb Mt. Cristo Rey to the giant statue of Jesus at the top and mass led by a cardinal from LA.

Halloween party - paint pumpkins, carve pumpkins, watch as volunteers create awesome backdrop for pictures of the kiddos in their costumes, make popsicle stick frames for pictures, give out candy, watch halloween kiddo movies. enjoy the company of many.

Story time - read Tattoos on the Heart to Laura and Luis. I forgot how much I really enjoy reading out loud. It gives me a good barometer on myself; if I'm reading smoothly or without cadence, if I'm still stressed or beginning to relax. It's also a plain funny book to read out loud. I'm not a homegirl, and the Spanish he throws in catches my English-first tongue off guard.  

Monday. Took the day off. Sat in the living room with Laura. Smiled. Sighed. Breathed deeply. JustFaith.

Tuesday. Dia de los Muertos. Woke up feeling awful. Would rather have divorced my stomach. Reason told me that would be a poor choice. Felt better after a nap. 

went into work early - left to pick up Laura  and head to the border mass. 

(Bread's done - it smells AMAZING. I need some good potato soup to go with this.)

Border Mass. I could write all day about this. It's not a joke, but sometimes it felt like one. 

Past the turnoff for Cristo Rey, past Ardovino's Crossing, past the little outcropping of trailers that may as well be Mexico, is an open space by the fence. Anapra. 

Anapra, New Mexico. Anapra, Mexico. Catholic priests from all three sides (Texas, NM, and Mexico) gather, along with hundreds of faithful, calling to mind those who have died crossing the border, calling out the names of those who have been killed in Juarez, even this week, calling in a voice louder than shouts for peace in the land. The priests kept reminding us how beautiful it was, how beautiful the people on both sides of the fence, how beautiful the land we all share and love, how beautiful that we can worship the same God no matter where we are or how we are. But I can't help but think that an ugliness wants to creep in and overshadow the beauty. Or perhaps it's the foundation we all have to work from. The ugly truth that we can't truly concelebrate the mass. We cannot drink from the same cup. We cannot eat the same bread. How can a body live separated from itself? We've got to try. The sign of peace was heartwrenching. Tracey and Sr. Carol were on the other side; Tuesday is a clinic day, and they had brought the children from Santo Nino to the wall to celebrate. Tracey and I can embrace at any other time in our lives, practically, and had less than 24 hours before, but this one time, no matter how much we wanted it, there would be no hug. And we have been friends for six weeks. A priest not allowed to return to Mexico stood at the wall talking with dozens of those who remember his work. Brenda found a friend she hadn't seen in six years. Mothers and children, husbands and wives see each other. But the only thing that fits through the fence are emotions, expressions, and fingers, and this has to be good enough for now. US Border Patrol stands on one side, and Mexican police on the other. 

Jesus, release your freedom and peace in this place.

The good feelings of the morning didn't last. Came home early and went to bed. blech blech blech. 

Wednesday. Miraculously better. really. My personal advice sister tells me I need to drink some electrolytes. I buy some before heading to Aceitunas, a fun bar (which I was assured I would like because there were trees in the middle of it). Some out-of-town JVs were here for a border immersion, so we wanted to show them the best of the city. We got home, set the JVs up on our extra beds and couch, and head to bed. 

Thursday. Wake up slowly with some interesting short stories by Andres Dubus. Skip cross training (Sorry Nathan!). Go to work. Try to figure out why my to-do list is growing and not shrinking. Color with an eight-year-old. Comfort crying children. The usual :) More story time and cooking.

Friday. Work. Went to Salud! Peace of Art event to listen to Nathan play violin - felt like Portland. Weird. Not that Portland's weird...I just mean that it's weird that it felt like Portland...but it could be...weird, that is. Portland, that is. Not El Paso. But it could be...

The music was beautiful, the art was super cool - they have a poster exhibit by graphic designers from Juarez - if it ever comes anywhere near you, you should check it out. 

Tried to see Inception at the $2 theater with friends - were a bit late, which just doesn't fly for that movie. Saw The Switch instead - cute. worth the $2. Promised to RedBox Inception when it comes out. 

Almost hiked at McKittrick Canyon this morning - decided to wait and go when Colleen is home (SOON!)

Oh.
Week 2: El Paso Half Marathon Training
Week 2: forgaddaboudit

On tap for today: clean, eat good bread, fix bike, make good soup, softball practice, wait for my laura to come home, read. sounds like a worry-free day to me.

Out of the wreck of our disfigured, misshapen selves, so darkened by shame and disgrace, indeed the Lord comes to us disguised as ourselves. And we don't grow into this - we just learn to pay better attention. The "no matter whatness" of God dissolves the toxicity of shame and fills us with tender mercy. Favorable, finally, and called by name - by the one your mom uses when she's not pissed off.

We all just want to be called by the name our mom uses when she's not pissed off at us.


 - Gregory Boyle, SJ